the power of denial

Peter. The Rock. He was a guy in Scripture that got a great name change. He’s one of my favorities when it comes to character studies. This guy lived petal to the medal, all out, full-on with reckless abandon for Christ. Yet when Peter would fall – he would fall hard. But Peter had a unique way of bouncing back after hard falls.
I’m thinking specifically of the time when Peter (who probably thought he was at the top of his game) denied Christ. Not just a brick shot at the hoop, but a total air ball. No net, backboard, iron – no nothing.

That must have been devastating. But instead of sitting the second half out – Peter wants back in the game. His next step was to surrender to God’s strength. He realized he was operating out of his own abilities and what he thought was strength. It looked great from the outside – on fire, speak what’s on my mind, going all the way, I’ll never deny you attitude… but what his mind and heart desired, couldn’t be sustained by his strength alone.

Lesson learned. For Peter that is. For me… well… still learning. Jesus said it this way, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” Jesus says deny your own strength, abilities and talents and let me support your passion and desires.

This is so opposite from what we hear in the world around us. I was raised here in the do it yourself, pull yourself up by your bootstraps, if you want to be it – believe it culture of “success”. Yet as true to form, the Kingdom operates quite opposite of culture. Every day of my life, I must come to the place where I fall on my face and say, “God I can’t do this on my own. I give up.” The power of denial.
That’s where it must all begin… it must begin at the end of ourselves.

God bring me to the end of myself – the place where I rest in your strength alone.

busy pastor

I was recently captivated and challenged by a quote from Eugene Peterson in his book The Contemplative Pastor, where he says that the adjective 'busy' describing 'pastor' ought to sound to us as jarring as 'adulterous' and 'husband' or 'embezzling' and 'banker'.

Here are some more quotes from Peterson's book and really have implications to any profession (beyond pastors) and simply in how we live our lives and structure our days.

“I (and most pastors, I believe) become busy for two reasons; both are ignoble.

“I am busy because I am vain.

“I want to appear important. Significant. What better way than to be busy?… I live in a society in which crowded schedules and harassed conditions are evidence of importance, so I develop a crowded schedule and harassed conditions. When others notice, they acknowledge my significance, and my vanity is fed.

“I am busy because I am lazy.

“I indolently let others decide what I will do instead of resolutely deciding myself. Let people who do not understand the work of the pastor write the agenda for my day’s work because I am too slipshod to write it myself…. It was a favorite theme of C. S. Lewis that only lazy people work hard. By lazily abdicating the essential work of deciding and directing, establishing values and setting goals, other people do it for us; then we find ourselves frantically at the last minute, trying to satisfy a half dozen different demands on our time, none of which I essential to our vocation, to stave off the disaster of disappointing someone…."

I don't know if my life fits these descriptions or just simply "I'm busy because I don't know how to operate otherwise!" Meaning I can't get everything done that is asked of me and haven't learned how to prioritize or say "No".

All I can say is that I'm really challenged by this. I desire to focus on what is important to God. I want to invest in the Kingdom and eternal things. I've taken some words of Paul from Philippians 3 to speak into this area of my life, "As a result, I can really know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I can learn what it means to suffer with him, sharing in his death, so that, somehow, I can experience the resurrection from the dead!

Basically, can I know Christ is such a way to overcome busyness? Can I be raised to new life and experience the power that allowed Him to minister out of the overflow of His connection with His Father? Can I keep the main thing the main thing and invest like Jesus did in what matters?